October 10, 2026
Palm Springs
Dear Joaquin,
This morning, my friend Paul engaged me in a uniquely desert experience. We drove out into the dusty wilderness and collected VERY large rocks to put in the rock landscape of what was once his front lawn. Paul is a very physical guy. He once moved a number of rocks from one side of Comfort Island to the other, dismantling one wall and helping to create another.
So, I owed him.
With Palm Springs encouraging the replacement of thirsty lawns with desert landscaping, there’s a race to create the coolest rock gardens. Paul was intent on building up his.
By my nature, I’m not a desert guy. I don’t like the heat, or the dryness. I feel my body becoming a husk as I breathe in the overheated air. It’s an uncomfortable place for me, physically and emotionally. I’m a water guy. Comfort is surrounded by the River and that’s why I chose it for my home.
Still, I have friends who choose to live here. They love the sharp edges of the mountains, the solitary palm trees and the thorny bougainvillea. And they love the heat. I do not.
So back to Paul. We lifted these giant rocks from the base of the hill from where they had fallen, some quite beautiful with rough quartz edges and brought them back to his place. There, he and Jeremy jockeyed them into position, impossible groupings made to look like they had fallen there naturally.
Jeremy is a detail guy….and Paul, grunting and pushing, would move the rocks six inches to the left…or pivot them four inches to the right. I’m the same with plants in our gardens, placing them with a recklessness to make them feel natural. My grandfather used to line up his marigolds in order, zinnias behind…very German, very orderly, very not me.
I bring the same thought into Comfort and the placement of objects and works of art and furniture. Sometimes it takes a little extra work to make things feel warm, natural and inviting.
And sometimes, it means letting go of order and letting natural chaos in. My mother always said, “if folks don’t feel like they can put their feet up, you’ve done something wrong.” Folks spill wine. Dogs get up on the sofas. Food falls on the carpet. It’s okay. I can’t be precious about it.
Hope you’re keeping dry during Atlanta Pride. Can’t wait to see you in a few weeks.
Stephen